How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I need water and some morals
I think people are normalizing furries
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize