ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
