ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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