Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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