So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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