She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
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