flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
