Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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