did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
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