I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
