Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
