in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
