No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I will be naked everywhere
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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