Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
