A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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