It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Randomize
