He is an equal opportunity slut.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
