Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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