Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Having a random hookup so left but love u
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize