This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
