Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
