well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
We left the knife in your bed.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I am mentally ready for anal.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
