About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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