the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
