i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i just google imaged poop.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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