Your tits are I can't wait for
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
