i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
