Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I will pee on everything he values.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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