there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
