Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
