i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
