whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
