drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
ttyl tear gas
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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