yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
