yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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