I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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