i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Dick very happy bro
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