The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
