Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize