if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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