So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
