You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
