New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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