She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize