Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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