But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
