Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
