Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
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