my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
