Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
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