I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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