Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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